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After Marriage Counseling Newport Beach Couples Can Start Anew

By Jose Mitchell


The divorce rate has gone through the roof. Statistics show that couples often opt for divorce before even considering some form of therapy to salvage their relationship. The sad fact is that it is often the children in such marriages that suffer the most. When marriages break down, it is not just the immediate members of the affected family that suffer. But, with professional marriage counseling Newport Beach families can resolve their issues.

Experienced therapists know that many couples that consider a divorce act impulsively, reacting instinctively to events and problems. Their emotions rule, not their common sense. In the vast majority of cases, ineffective or even non existent communication lies at the root of the problem. This causes couples to drift apart from each other. In fact, most marriages break down due to a number of smaller issues rather than one major catastrophic event.

Not all marriages can be saved. In some cases it is actually better to dissolve the bond. Physical, emotional and sexual abuse, for example, cannot be tolerated and the suffering partner will be better off with a divorce. The same is true for marriages where one partner consistently abuse substances such as drugs and alcohol. Unless the offending partner agree to go for therapy, such marriages can cause more harm than good.

Once a relationship is in serious trouble the chances of the two partners to resolve the issues between them are rather slim. It is much better to seek professional help and to include the children in the process. Children are particularly vulnerable when their parents are in conflict and they often get the idea that the entire situation is their fault.

It is important to select a therapist with experience in working with couples and families. This professional should not be a family friend or even someone known socially by either or both partners. This will ensure objectivity and confidentiality. Couples must not expect instant results. In many cases therapy may last for many sessions but it has to be worth it if that original mutual attraction can be restored.

It is also important to understand that the therapist cannot solve the problems of their clients. Their role is to facilitate the process of healing and growth. They can help couples to communicate with each other and to resolve conflict issues. They can also help in identifying those issues that truly need to be addressed as part of the healing process.

Apart from being time consuming, therapy requires hard work and a total commitment from each partner. They must have a true desire to salvage their relationship. In order to do so, they need to become willing to listen, to compromise and to see things from different angles. It is also important to be honest during therapy, otherwise the real problems will never be aired and dealt with.

There can be no doubt that it is worth it to do everything possible to salvage a marriage on the point of breaking down. Couples in successful long term relationships will agree that marriages requires work, effort and compromise from both partners. A therapist can help couples to to thrive as life partners.




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